Do you ever have those moments when you are trying to figure something out, but just can’t? Of course. Everyone does. But I’m talking about those moments when somehow your subconscious knows that all the pieces to the puzzle are there, but for some reason your brain is just not putting them together, and meanwhile you are frantically hoping that no one will notice just how long it’s taken you to find the elevator call button?
I went to Ikea today. Land of genius ideas, cheap merchandise, and a maze-like layout. This last characteristic is a blessing when you are cruising Ikea with friends and are pretending to be hipster-European-apartment-dwellers with only 150 square feet of living space, but more like a curse when you want to stop in for one item. Like today.
I had Charlotte in the stroller so I went straight for the elevators. This is what I saw on the wall:
I stared at it. Really? A touch-sensitive elevator button? Well of course. This is Ikea, people. They are just so high tech. Of course they have an invisible touch-sensitive elevator button. With absolutely no markings on it. And a giant arrow pointing to where it is, if you just believe.
So of course I touched it. Rubbed it, for good measure (I couldn’t tell exactly where it was). And you know what? I heard a ding. A movement. Something. I waited faithfully. Nothing. This process is repeated at least 2 more times.
Finally. Two girls who look to be about my age come up with their kids in tow. I say, This elevator button is like touch sensitive or something! But I can’t get it to work. These crazy Europeans. Maybe you guys can figure it out? One of them goes up and pushes the elevator call button, which is of course the one on the bottom. (And may I just point out, not where the arrow is pointing.)
This lady must be the nicest person on the planet; she tried not to make me feel like an idiot (but let’s be honest, there was really no going back at that point). She even introduced herself and made small talk. Thanks for being nice, Becca, whoever you are. I hope one day you tell your grandkids the story about The Idiot at Ikea Who Thought Elevators Were Magic and Needed to be Rubbed Like Genies.
But get ready to walk on the wild side people. The eggs in this pie are not cooked. Unless you count mixing them with melted chocolate cooking. Bring it! In your face salmonella!
*Update* Check out Kristy’s blog to see the back story on this pie. Also for pictures of me looking like a small woodland creature licking my plate. Plus adorable pictures of Charlotte. Why are you still here?
Chocolate Honey Chiffon Pie
Source: “The Perfect Pie” by Susan G. Purdy
For the graham cracker crust:
1 1/2 cups finely ground graham cracker crumbs
1/3 cup white sugar
6 tablespoons butter, melted
Mix graham cracker crumbs, sugar, and melted butter until well blended . Press mixture into an 8 or 9 inch pie plate.
Stash it in the fridge while you make the filling.
2 large eggs, at room temperature
1/2 cup sour cream
6 ounces semisweet chocolate chips
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup honey
chocolate curls or grated chocolate (optional; instructions follow)
Separate the eggs, placing the yolks in a small bowl and the whites in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the largest balloon beater you have. Spoon the sour cream into a measuring cup and place near the stove, along with the egg yolks; you’ll need them handy when working with the chocolate.
Melt chocolate in the top of a double boiler over hot (not boiling ) water. (I don’t have a double boiler so I just set a wide glass bowl onto a pot of water. Use hot pads if you do this.)
While the chocolate is melting, begin preparing the egg whites. Add the salt the whites; measure the honey and set it nearby. Beat the whites until stiff but not dry, then very gradually add the honey while continuing to beat until stiff peaks form. Do not despair if the whites look soft after you add the honey. Beat for 4 or 5 minutes, and they will stiffen beautifully. The bigger the beater and the more powerful the mixer, the easier and quicker this job is, but no matter what type beater you use, it will work if you just keep at it.
As soon as the chocolate is melted, remove it from the heat, add the yolks, and whisk vigorously. Then replace over the heat and whisk for about 30 seconds, or slightly more, until the mixture forms a ball and pulls away form the sides of the pan, Immediately remove the top of the double boiler from the heat. Stir in the sour cream and beat until smooth.
When the egg whites are stiff, gently and gradually fold them into the chocolate mixture. Spoon the mixture into the prepared crust and cover with plastic wrap to protect the flavor. (Make sure you pull it very taut. If the plastic touches the filling it will stick. Mine did at first so I had to lick it off and use a new square of plastic. Life’s hard.) Chill in the refrigerator for at least 3 hours or overnight, to set. Garnish with chocolate curls or grated chocolate.
For the chocolate curls:
Put 3 ounces of semisweet chocolate in a small bowl with 1 tablespoon of shortening. Microwave in 30 second intervals until it is melted. Spread melted chocolate very thinly on the back of a baking sheet and freeze for 3 minutes. Using a metal spatula, scrape the chocolate off. When the chocolate is the right temperature it will curl. Check out the tutorial if you are totally lost.